Warning: bikinis are not suitable wedding attire
Three marriages down for Canada’s most notorious export since Bryan Adams promised everything he did could be blamed on someone else, and Pammy is now distraught about how the bad press might impact on her (allegedly literate) children.
Far be it from me to connect the dots on this one, but possibly continuing to get married in bikinis while swilling on alcohol may be a contributing factor in her lack of form in the remaining married stakes?
I mean, what are the odds? Marry some bloke you barely know while half cut and wearing a bikini, and the marriage fails? If Pammy is our A study, then the odds are 100 per cent.
And given she’s tried it, wearing the same outfit another two times I think we can now safely say that she’s completed the ABA study and so grounded knowledge suggests that bikinis, alcohol and marriage do not a happy combination make.
Stop the presses!
She’s obviously not lacking in the getting a husband stakes. It seems that there are an infinite number of blokes all willing to hook up with their own breathing, talking living doll. Possibly they have plans to use their marriage to propel them into a career in films? (Although while the films might make them notorious, I don’t see Tommy Lee being asked for his advice about camera angles or lighting by Scorsese or Spielberg… )
She just seems to be lacking in the keeping a husband stakes. She seems to discard them as quickly as she upsizes/downsizes her implants, and I place the blame entirely on the wedding attire.
Given the entire purpose of wedding attire is to make the bride look like as much like an enormous gift wrapped object as possible, complete with veil to hide the bride’s face from the groom (presumably to engage in some kind of trickery and marry off uglier/fatter sisters) tying the knot in nowt but a series of strategically place white triangle squares really does seem to be raising one’s finger to the time honoured tradition of committing matrimony.
And as for the grooms, how would they feel knowing she’s wearing EXACTLY the same outfit as the prior two marriages? Surely that’s just asking for the marriage to be cursed.
To be honest, I’m not even sure who the second one was. She originally married the guy with the tatts who hit her. And they had their two kids (both named after 90210 characters… so I guess it’s fortunate she wasn’t into Wind in the Willows…), then he went to prison and pretty much around that time I stopped caring.
I do wonder, however, what’re the protocols re: serial divorcer? Do you have to keep buying them gifts? And at what stage will she stop getting married in a white bikini. Surely after two kids and 3 failed marriages, going the traditional white route seems somewhat delusional?
Far be it from me to connect the dots on this one, but possibly continuing to get married in bikinis while swilling on alcohol may be a contributing factor in her lack of form in the remaining married stakes?
I mean, what are the odds? Marry some bloke you barely know while half cut and wearing a bikini, and the marriage fails? If Pammy is our A study, then the odds are 100 per cent.
And given she’s tried it, wearing the same outfit another two times I think we can now safely say that she’s completed the ABA study and so grounded knowledge suggests that bikinis, alcohol and marriage do not a happy combination make.
Stop the presses!
She’s obviously not lacking in the getting a husband stakes. It seems that there are an infinite number of blokes all willing to hook up with their own breathing, talking living doll. Possibly they have plans to use their marriage to propel them into a career in films? (Although while the films might make them notorious, I don’t see Tommy Lee being asked for his advice about camera angles or lighting by Scorsese or Spielberg… )
She just seems to be lacking in the keeping a husband stakes. She seems to discard them as quickly as she upsizes/downsizes her implants, and I place the blame entirely on the wedding attire.
Given the entire purpose of wedding attire is to make the bride look like as much like an enormous gift wrapped object as possible, complete with veil to hide the bride’s face from the groom (presumably to engage in some kind of trickery and marry off uglier/fatter sisters) tying the knot in nowt but a series of strategically place white triangle squares really does seem to be raising one’s finger to the time honoured tradition of committing matrimony.
And as for the grooms, how would they feel knowing she’s wearing EXACTLY the same outfit as the prior two marriages? Surely that’s just asking for the marriage to be cursed.
To be honest, I’m not even sure who the second one was. She originally married the guy with the tatts who hit her. And they had their two kids (both named after 90210 characters… so I guess it’s fortunate she wasn’t into Wind in the Willows…), then he went to prison and pretty much around that time I stopped caring.
I do wonder, however, what’re the protocols re: serial divorcer? Do you have to keep buying them gifts? And at what stage will she stop getting married in a white bikini. Surely after two kids and 3 failed marriages, going the traditional white route seems somewhat delusional?
